October 26th, 2010
Worrying? Again?
Do you find yourself worrying about an upcoming test? Or, when you are in the middle of an exam answering questions, are you worrying then?
The first thing to know is that it’s normal. Just about everyone worries from time to time.
Second, know this: worrying never solves anything. Anything. Worrying just breeds more worrying. Haven’t you noticed that when you continue to worry
October 5th, 2010
Appreciate your greatness
It’s well known, in the circles of positive psychology, that expressing appreciation is a powerful tool for improving relationships and performance. Usually we think of expressing appreciation to someone else– someone who has done something for us or with us, whose contribution we want to acknowledge.
We don’t often think of expressing appreciation to ourselves, about ourselves. In fact, in workshops I offer when we get to this part, people are often stymied. What can I appreciate about myself?
Appreciation means “perceiving value” and “expressing gratitude.”
June 27th, 2010
One of the chief ways we become distracted is by our own thinking. We start thinking about the past or the future or about something else other than what’s going on now, in the present. When we’re distracted we lose focus and then it’s much harder to progress towards our goals. Our stress goes up and our performance is compromised – whether it’s on a test or when we’re facing any challenge in life. We literally fall off the path.
An example of this is when we become distracted by our own old fears. I can’t handle this, I’m not good enough, I can’t keep it together…and other negative thinking. “Negative” here means minus-ing, taking away from. But taking
June 24th, 2010
Are you tense?
At a recent lecture I gave at the University of California San Francisco medical school, I was teaching the first year students how to use the calming tools: breathing, grounding and sensing.
Breathing is by far the most important of all 9 tools in the performance model. So much has been said and written about breathing, and no wonder! When we don’t breathe regularly it causes all sorts of mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual problems.
After we worked on grounding, one of the students had a brilliant observation. First, to remind you:
June 20th, 2010
Use a timer: you'll stay focused
Often people ask me “What’s the best way to stay focused?”
Here’s what I recommend: use a timer. Whether it’s on your digital watch, your i-pad, your cell phone, or one that you set up on your computer, I’ve found the timer to be my biggest aide to staying focused.
The procedure goes like this:
April 6th, 2010
Why are we stuck listening to the negative voice?
A student I am working with has a problem. Here’s what she says about it: “Every time on a test when I’m not sure if my answer is right, I immediately have negative thoughts, ‘You’re not going to get this right,’ ‘You don’t know the material,” ‘You can’t figure this out.’ Why do I always think these negative thoughts?”
This is a great question and something I’ve wondered about for a long time. It’s a very common situation: in a difficult or doubtful situation most of us usually veer towards the negative. What’s going on? In a series of posts I’m going to address this issue. Today we’ll look at one cause and one method of dealing with it.
March 29th, 2010
Today I watched a TV clip of an interview with someone who wrote about reducing test anxiety. If I were a student about to take the SAT or GRE or GMAT or LSAT, I would have found it woefully wanting. It’s not that the information was wrong (the specialist talked about “breathing”) but it was all so “tips” oriented. What do I mean and what’s wrong with “tips”?
December 16th, 2009
PTO Emery is a bright light in East Bay
On Monday night I had the honor of being the featured speaker at the Emeryville Unified School district’s parent teacher’s association meeting. After a delicious holiday dinner we all moved into the library of Emery Secondary School and PTO President Brynnda Collins introduced me. The school district generously provided each parent at the meeting with a copy of my book. I gave a talk on the book and particularly chapter 5, “How to Calm Down.” I think the material in this chapter is particularly helpful for parents when their kids are stressed out about tests.
